hello, Hong Kong!

i had a long overdue chat with my bro, Nark, this week, catching up on the happenings of Hong Kong vs. Oakville. i told him that it was dripping humidity here, and mostly, my days still consisted of GTL & tuna sandwiches. he told me they were finishing up the final pieces of their powder room remodeling (or just simply 'bathroom', for those who don't partake in the powdery stuff).

the conversation then shifted back to the topic of 'me' and how I should take advantage of all this available time on my hands to truly 'master' something.
i.e. to start something, from scratch perhaps, and work at it until i reach a yet to be determined goal.
alright, i'm game....whatya got?

Nark's first suggestion: training for a marathon.
not a bad option straight out of the gates. it's essentially free, and relies more or less solely on my two feet and a heartbeat. unfortunately, i worry that the latter would give out on me well before i ever hit that 26th mile, and for that reason, next...

my follow-up idea was to train for a decathlon. figure it's the perfect sport for a generalist like me. only problem being that i'm missing a pole vault pit...and a javelin...and many other key elements.

what about a language?
this is something that Aline has been bugging me about as well. there's no doubt that learning Cantonese or Mandarin would help me understand this new home of mine and would look good on the CV.
my concerns - i can make sense of something like French or Spanish, but we're now talking about a script-based alphabet. it's really like a big memory game, flipping over symbols in my head to read a simple street sign.
i also fear that by the time i figure it all out, we likely won't be living in Asia (or Richmond) for it to have much practical use.
next.

cooking?
hmm...i am interested in adding more than stir-fry's & fajitas to our weekly menu.
though, i don't think i could stand the comparisons between my experience in the kitchen to that painfully annoying Amy Adams, and her role as that Julie chick....or was it Julia...?
been done. next.

modeling?
ha. although, i do give my agency credit, they are certainly persistent with the casting calls. i just had another 'potential' gig floated my way, this time for jeans. think i'll need to channel a little Brett Favre for this one, wrist watch and all. as always, i will keep you posted, but let's be honest, looks are not really something i can 'master'. just like Gaga, i was born this way.
next.

we could have kept going for hours on this, but we hung up our Skype call agreeing to put my future escapades on hold. however, later that same day, i read a local CNNGo article that has given me an itch that i think needs to be scratched.....
i wanna be a star! well, to be more specific, i want to try to write some material for an open-mic routine. although, even thinking about going through with it scares the hell outta me. it's one thing to give a toast at a wedding, in front of friends/family, but another thing to come up with 'bits' for an audience of strangers, who are probably drunk and likely funnier than i am. and it's true, i can't really do much about the funny part, but i can certainly try to take the edge off myself a little with some pre-show binge drinking.

and so i write....
nothing all that novel about me writing...but with this, I have a clear focus of making people laugh. i really don't have any idea how my blog posts are received, and for me to get up on stage and perform more or less my blog material will now offer me some real-time insight into my ramblings.

and so i write....
but first, i need to set a goal. sadly i think it'll be atleast a month or so to workout some decent material for a 5-minute set. let's say, on the record, that before Freedom 32 turns Freedom 33 in July, i will get up on stage.
in more immediate baby-step terms, i'm also going to build up my confidence at a poetry-reading night down at a local bar. i figure i already have 2 poems in the can, and can bang one or two more out pretty quick (plus there's a free drink for every poet). i'll even commit to debuting these before the month is out. i figure the poetry crowd should go a little easier on me, should i bomb, with heckles coming back at me like sweet limericks on a breezy summer day.
you've been a terrific audience, drive safely.

Master P Theatre Presents....

a while back, i wrote an off-the-cuff poem about a foot massage parlour.
it was quick & dirty (the poem, not the parlour), yet still received at least one request for an encore.
i won't out the lover of poetry in the ranks, just in case not everyone shared his/her enthusiasm.
but hey, i had fun throwing it together, so it would be my pleasure to create something new.

to start, i need some inspiration.
i can't just sit down and rock out some prose like it ain't no thing.
something magical or majestic needs to take hold of me to spin my lyricist ways.
today, being a slow sunny Monday, i replaced work & adventure with respite by the Bamboo Grove apartments' community pool for a couple of hours. i suppose that'll have to do.
and so, it begins.

Bamboo sunnin',
that hot summer's comin',
this is the way that we play.

sitting cool by the pool,
did i mention teacher hours rule?
too bad i can't say the same about the pay.

shirt's off, we're skins
as the iPod record spins,
but please don't get carried away.

as my body's still burnin'
while the world be turnin',
damn 7-11 & their spray.

let's see...what else can i rhyme...?
oh, here's some more -

babies are floatin',
mothers are doting,
a little girl be trying, but all she do is crying.

sweat building + heat rising,
may need to dip my lower left five in,
to see how the water is today.

"my word that's refreshing!",
i exclaim after testing.
it's official now - daddy's gonna get wet.

make way, everybody,
time for pool to meet pardy,
flip 'em over, i'm about to go all-in.

don't mean to be a miser,
but this includes you, lady in huge-ass pink visor.
sure that hat is so lame, it wouldn't even be funny at a dog poker game.
(to clarify, i'm talking about the classic picture of the dogs playing poker....not being mean about her looks).

a leap & a bound,
i'm off the ground,
plunging through that well-chlorinated blue.

my favourite stroke, you may ask?
it's very simple, don't laugh.
never one to be guile, i prefer my paddle doggy-style.

where's this flowin' about to be goin',
perhaps best to gas, before it gets too crass?
one more rhyme on a dime, then thankfully - quitting time.

and so i close & say sorry,
to those who may think it obscene,
to spend this time rappin' about la piscine.
for i completely agree,
it's even buggin' me,
that's it, this poem is over.

and so too is this post.