Year in Review/Holiday Special

the final post for 2011 has taken some time to produce.
excuses? sure, i have a few:
busy with work, busy with the Christmas season, busy in a burger king bathroom (once).
with no big trips to speak of, and understandably, no new modeling callbacks to share, this final entry needed to marinate a little.

the cherished 'year in review' segment offers a chance to look back on the year that was, reflecting on what made it special/unique/shocking & downright Chinese. without sounding like a clichébag, the year has gone by so amazingly fast. it seems like just yesterday (groan) that AA & I were celebrating the new year by jumping on a plane destined for a land far far away.

once settled into our new home, i was soon compelled to start sharing my story, with you all, about a man, his cat and a few million Chinese residents.

it feels like it was just yeterday…..
(flip through scrapbook)
ah yes, here we go….
who could forget the classic maiden voyage -
Local Canadian man retires at 32!

in fact, i'm going to come right out and say it - i could do no wrong in January. be honest, you're still thinking about those shoe shopping adventures or reminiscing with delight about the time i tangled with 10,000 buddahs…. from my side, it felt like all of you were there with me each step….

through the months, the misadventures continued;
i can picture most of you scrolling through the various contributions, shaking your heads, thinking - 'oh, that's rich'.

come May, with Spring emerging, i messed it all up.
you all know the story. 
i went and got unretired.

"since the last time you heard from me, I lost some friends.
well, hell, me and Romo, we dipping again."

without question, that selfish act of labour would forever change the relationship for some of us.
i take full responsibility, selling out for the dollar dollar, because apparently, dollar is what i need.
with the freedom was lost, came 6-figures (HKD, don't do the math) that i gained…..

"they say money can't buy happiness?
look at the amateur model smile on my face.
ear to ear, baby."

i've done my best to make amends, realizing that an average of 2 posts per month isn't going to win some of the early adopters back. i promise to strive for more drinking & dooring myself , more dress-up parties, and even the odd poem, as i know you enjoy them as much as i do.

and so here we meet, Year 1 complete.
sharing with you many highs, and of course, a few sighs.

the jetsetting asian trips, some surprise career dips.
a teacher by day, with dreams of the runway.

headhunted & stunted, we all must confess.
though, not too corporate for a night in gladiator dress.

2012 just ahead, visitors welcome with spare bed.
Merry Freedom to all, and to all a good Freedom.

btw - the Freedom tour is rolling into a city near you soon.
from Dec 23-Jan 5, catch the Freedom bus as it passes through Oakville, Toronto, and Rockport (where?), followed by a quick stint out on the West Coast, from Jan 6-8 in Vancouver.

you've been a great audience….don't change a thing.
Happy Holidays!

almost famous

let's be honest, when you get thrown a 'to be continued' hanger, it's usually best if that next chapter follows shortly thereafter. realizing i'm 2-weeks overdue on that, a quick recap is likely needed.
when we last left this amateur model, a costume had been donned, a script was in hand, and a woman named Coins was rolling on the cam.

let me start back up again by first clearing the air. i may have misled my fans slightly with the mention of 'lines' as part of my audition. while it may have appeared as though i was on the fast track to a TV commercial, this is in fact not the case. instead, the rehearsal was intended for a much more 'live' style of performance.

skip ahead to Friday night.

7pm: i finished up my day job and rushed off to an extremely popular bar area in central named Lan Kwai Fong (LKF). after arriving to the arranged meeting spot, i suddenly got cold feet. i asked myself - "do i really want to get dressed up like a gladiator & stroll around the busiest area in Hong Kong?"
no, i don't really.

but damn it, when i started this thing, i knew it wouldn't be easy. so, like any good 'model', i decided to freshen up with a happy hour Heineken around the corner. not to confuse 'model' with role model, kids; though, it did do the trick. chugging down some courage, i was now ready to role play.

730pm: i was greeted by the event team, all conveniently wearing blue American Express golf shirts (i've never wanted to be in a collar so badly). they escorted me to my dressing room - a parked minivan on the side of the road. crouching & grappling, i struggled to remove my street clothes, trading them for what looked like a white hospital gown, that damn leather skirt again, and ye ole sandals. exiting the van, the street team got busy. the chest-piece was the first item to go on, although the front part kept separating from the back. "too muscular", they told me, playing to my ego early & often. wristlets on, shin guards strapped, sword, shield and broom hat in place. time for the walk of shame to begin.

8pm: fortunately, i wasn't the only one dressed up that night. in addition to my crew of blue-shirted locals, there was actually another male model rep'ing the very same soldier gear that evening. Alex, probably 10 years my junior, was cool as a cucumber…a real pro. he strutted his stuff like he'd been wearing that thing for years; and with that, i started to feed off his chiseled confidence and embraced the character i was set to play.
as we reached the doorstep of LKF, heads beginning to turn, eyeballs gazing, i held my broom hat high and marched alongside my new found friends. it was probably a good thing we kicked off as early as we did, not giving the patrons enough time to fuel themselves up yet with Spartan juice. after a few minutes, we quickly ducked into the first establishment on our list, ready to start the show.

830pm: the mission for the night was dead simple:
step 1 - look for people wearing blue (colours of American Express)
step 2 - approach guest and ask "i couldn't help notice you're wearing blue…?!"
step 3 - while still grinning like an idiot, ask patron if they have an American Express card
step 4 - if the answer to #3 is yes, give them a free drink ticket.
if the answer to #3 is no, decide whether they are a good soul or not, and give them a free drink ticket if it feels right.
the first interaction was a little awkward. i think i fumbled my lines a bit, something closer to "i couldn't help but notice i blue you...", or something like that. but very quickly, i genuinely started to have fun with it all. in the back room of the first bar, there was a crowd of 20 or so older folks, all there to celebrate a birthday of some sort. it just so happened that each and everyone of them was a loyal AmEx card carrying member. figuring it was a setup, i still quickly ran around the table, dishing out free sauce to seniors.
they hooted & they hollered. they probably thought it was perfect timing for the stripper to show up.

9pm: things started to really flow. we hit up the Hard Rock, one of the largest bars in the area, looking for blue in all the right places. we'd then scurry out into the street, amidst the flashing iPhones capturing this piece of Halloween hangover. people were legitimately excited to stop me, bypassing the 'why' and going straight for the 'can'…as in "can we take a photo with you?".
being the good character 'model' that i am, i was more than happy to oblige, even offering the fans the chance to hold my sword……
…
it was great. my team was super cool as well, treating me with the respect that an amateur 'model' deserves. during breaks, they would literally fan me down (not kidding) and rush to my side with an open bottle of water at the slightest sign of fatigue. i've been secretly craving this sort of attention my whole life.

10pm: that's a wrap. cross it off the list, i officially completed a paid gig as a 'model'. speaking of pay, thank god i have a real job. not only is the pay paltry, the payment terms are 60-days net. that's straight up offensive. if that's the way they're going to treat me, it may be time to start considering an agent.

in closing, thank you for all of those that believed in me. we did it!

unfortunately, a gladiator costume does not come with pockets, and as such, i wasn't able to carry my phone for pictures of the extravaganza. you'll just have to take my word for all of it.
short of a pic documenting the evening, i'm pleased to offer up something even better.
happy bday, Mum!

they pulled me back in

there's an expression in the modeling biz that you "can't teach pretty". as a one-time amateur model, i firmly believe this to be true. although extremely tough, over the past few months, i have come to terms that my moment to glisten may have passed me by.
tanktops lay folded in the dresser.
model face showcased solely in the company of my own mirror.
life goes on and you resign yourself to simply being just another regular joe.
that is until the phone rings.

me - 'Hello?'
agency - 'Is this Rich?'
me - 'It is.'
agency - 'Would you be available for a casting tonight?'
me (heart racing) - '..I could be. What is it for?'
agency - 'You would need to dress in a costume….a woman's costume.'
me (still interested) - 'Excuse me? What type of costume?'
agency - 'A Roman's costume.'
me (somewhat relieved) - 'Where & when!?'

the passion still burns.

upon arrival at the modeling agency, i met with an agent named 'Coins'.
*note to self, name first daughter (or next cat) 'Coins'.
the casting process, as it should be, is broken down into small manageable model steps.

Step #1 - take a few candids
easy. before going through the rigors of wardrobe, the agency always wants to see if you freeze on camera. a couple of snaps and if you pass, it's on to the next step.

Step #2 - go Roman
grabbing hold of the underarmour and sandals, i retreated into the small bathroom to start the transformation. a white knee-length pullover, a leathery skirt type of garb and open-toes.
shit, maybe this is me crossing over to 'Richelle' after-all.
upon returning to the shoot area, i was relieved to see the rest of the gear laid out for me. wristlets, chest armor, sword, shield, and broom helmet.
not bad…to the point where i started planning my early Halloween costume if they'd let me borrow it. a few more shots on camera, being somewhat confused if i'm supposed to be an angry Roman or a sultry Roman…. i went with a hybrid look.

Step #3 - the speech
the final component of the session required me to get in front of the vid cam to run some lines. ideally, this would have meant a tv or movie role. instead, the script details out a sales pitch, to be muttered to patrons in a local eatery.

surprise!!
turns out, the gig is for American Express, 'modeling' as a glorified Roman waiter & treating diners to a free glass of wine if they flash their AmEx.
whatever, it still counts.
the script, while very corporate, was also fairly hilarious in its broken English. having only looked at it briefly, i was inclined to freestyle it a little bit, but also knew the AmEx brass would want me to stick to the lines.
and so I began:

"Hello sir/madame. sorry to border your dining. We are from American Express card. Simply show your American card to us, you will receive a token to redeem a glass of red wine which totally FREE. Our promoters will drop down some general details to get us started."

there was also a problem with some math in the script, but i didn't want to break character….
it appears Romans don't do proper English or math.
and that was it.
they thanked me for my time and sent me on my way. no offense, but i've had the same bad taste in my mouth from previous castings, so there will be no kissing ass.
ok, maybe a little….(flash smile/wink).

a few days pass.
phone rings.
coffee is for closers.
you're looking at Hong Kong's next top Roman.

to be continued….

$5

2 posts, 1 week...i must be feeling a little frisky.
first & foremost, big golden hawk shoutout to J9, an oldie but a goody. great to catch up after 6+ years, half way across the world.

second & second-most, a quick softball update:  
Doghouse WIN, Doghouse WIN!
in a stunning turn of events, team Doghouse pulled out an impressive 8-4 victory on Saturday afternoon, finally getting their schneid-busting first win of the season. donning crisp new jerseys, the 'look good, play good' theory was in full effect.
my stat line: 1-3, with a double & a run scored

and now, a funny haircut tale.
this afternoon, after sending J9 on a train back to China, it was time to lose the shag.
after testing out a few barbers in the first few months here, i've now settled on my go-to establishment. there's nothing flashy about the place.
it's close & it's cheap, and ever since losing my modeling tour card, there's really no pressure on how the cut turns out.
the shop is very small, although there's enough room to accommodate 6 patrons. typically there are more employees than customers, as it's apparently used as more of a place to hangout, eat noodles and shoot the Cantonese shit than it is to "salon".
though, today was somewhat of an exception, as i scooped up the last free chair, right next to the lady wearing what i can only describe as some weird alien perm helmet.

my barber of choice is an older gentlemen and is strictly business. he doesn't ask many questions or offer up any pleasantries, given the obvious language barrier.
it's simply 2 questions - "short?" and "over-the-ears?"
to which I respond - "medium, and yes.", likely confusing the man.
fine. let's get down to cutting.
it's always a super quick transaction…i'd say 7 mins or so…in complete silence which suits me just fine. no wash, no blow, no product. just cut, pay and go.
today, that process broke down a little.
in previous sittings, i've received the exact same service for a very agreeable price of $40HKD, or $5 back home. today, upon presenting the fine proprietor with a hong kong benjamin, i was confused with his return of merely $50 change.

below is the dialogue that ensued, in my abbreviated 'talk-to-a-local' English -  

Me: "$50? Not $40?" 
Barber (insulted/sarcastic laugh): "No, $50." 
Me: "Really?" pointing to sign on the glass door, that happens to be facing out, so it reads backwards…but still sure it says $40. 
Barber (now pissed off, shaking head): "No, $50."

he then proceeded to walk towards me, grabbing my arm (as i remember it, at least), and escorted me outside of the premise to read another sign on the front window. indeed, he pointed out that the new 'taped-over' price is $50. fine.

to be honest, it wasn't the price that had me concerned, it was more the principal. i felt i might be getting gweilo pricing, but now, with his determined effort to prove his argument, i was resigned to concede and offered him a 唔該 (m̀hgòi), or simply "ok, thank you".
i do not believe he accepted.

i still hope to go back one day, however, i may be the only white-ghost that actually goes there…and let's be honest, you never forget a white ghost.

The sun is rising once again

konnichiwa & arigato, my peeps….
these, by the way, were essentially the only two words i muttered in public during the week that was Japan.
like Hong Kong, Japan is indeed part of Asia…but that's about the only thing they have in common. think of it as a little more Europe, and a little less China. although communication in English is not so forthcoming, the people we did interact with were extremely courteous and friendly.
very civilized, very orderly. my kind of people.
case in point - our taxi ride to the hotel in Tokyo. our cab driver, an older gent, welcomes us to his land with a free pack of gum. a nice touch, not to mention the fresh breath.
and so, it began….


Tokyo: Beware - the Japanese vampire funboy

there's no denying the 'wow' factor that Tokyo presents. perhaps lessened slightly for a couple of kids from Hong Kong, but entirely clear as soon as we stepped out into the neon playground - that city has a beat. it is also massive. we get spoiled a little bit in our highly condensed world, where everything is 5 mins away via essentially free taxis. not the case in Tokyo, confirmed by the daily aches running through my arches. taxis are stupid expensive in Tokyo, so you're left to gaze at the city from underneath. the metro, a system of snakes & laddering all across the capital, handy to get where you need to go, but just not all that quick going down + across + up.
and so we rode & walked, & rode some more, hitting the spots on our consolidated list of must-sees. first thing i wanted to see, for whatever reason, was what i refer to as the 'times square' of Tokyo….or more accurately, Shibuya Crossing. you've all seen it…, a chaotic block of thousands of people crossing from one side of the street to the other. sounds fascinating doesn't it…, and so we went, and i can confirm the chaos. unlike the cool shots you may have seen from a movie, elevated above the street, when you're actually down amongst the masses, it's really not that sexy, you just gotta move.

this is just down the line from Kabukicho, the 'red-light' district. i know what you're thinking:
did i happen to stumble upon any undergarment vending machines…?

oh, that wasn't what you were thinking?
well, either way, i was unsuccessful.

not that i was considering myself to be a buyer, but more so an interest in uncovering the urban myth of whether people in Japan do in fact ante for panty. sadly, i can neither confirm or deny.
i can confirm that 'love hotels' do in fact exist. again, playing the role of less patron, more witness. from the outside, they don't seem all that different from a regular hotel, aside from the ability to 'rest' or 'stay'. the former is by the hour…for what i can only imagine is a power nap in-between walking your ass across the city.
amongst all of this, i didn't really have a problem with this part of town, that is, until the Japanese vampire funboys arrived. picture Lost Boys, only with subtitles, and cowboy boots. they came out from the darkness, every corner you turned, there they were. shuffling around in their boots, flipping their manes off the backs of their cool black leather, they huddled in groups handing out fliers to the innocent walking by. maybe it was the creepy factor, or perhaps the panic, but we actually did get lost in a sea of hair & rented love.

other highlights -

Tsujuki Fish Market - sushi, served fresh at 8am. i'll still choose pancakes, but when in rome i suppose…

Park Hyatt Hotel, 52nd floor - movie geeks will know this as the setting for about half of Lost in Translation, the epic classic of adultery & inappropriate friendship. Bill Murray, Suntory whiskey, piano bar…it's all there, and the view of the city is definitely worth the yen.


Hakone: cold feet for hot springs

the trip to Japan offered a fine balance of big city & little country. Hakone, about an hour south of Tokyo, is a little piece of green heaven and a stark contrast to the bustle we witnessed our first few days. the big thing about staying out this way is the 'tradition' it provides. forgo the chain hotel and stay at a ryokan Japanese inn. quaint doesn't really describe the setting of sliding doors and flatness. no chairs, instead, you get to sit on a pillow. no permanent bed either, it's folded up in the front closet. traditionally uncomfortable i have to admit, but very unique and glad we did it. the other very 'unique' feature of the ryokan is the hot springs, aka bath houses. not familiar with these? let me catch you up.

step 1 - throw on a kamono
step 2 - head down to the bath house
step 3 - disrobe
step 4 - crouch on a stool & wash self
step 5 - join the party in the tub

yes, the hot springs are a communal jam, where everyone's getting really friendly. i must admit, my first pass at bath time was a let down…i was the only dude in the place. lame.
second time through, success! another gentleman was keeping it warm for me, as i quickly slipped myself into the boil. was it awkward? perhaps a little bit…but in this case, it was elevated, given the fact he was a local, and thus not a lot of English happening. so, there we were. 2 guys, enjoying a bath side by side, unable to even share a clever 'boy, it's really hot in here…' quip. i'm pretty sure he snuck a peek.
finally, the last piece of tradition was what we ended up with on our plates that evening, and sadly, sushi does not make that list. very interesting dishes…most of which was a complete shot in the dark to I.D., but like camp, you either eat or go to bed hungry. so, we ate.
would i order it at a restaurant the next time i swing through Japan? no.
again, it's all part of the experience.
wrapping up the evening, we checked the cliche box, by watching Lost in Translation….


Kyoto: [fill in Accord-related joke later]

i must admit, Kyoto was the most surprising part of the entire trip. not knowing much about the place, i went in thinking it would be a poor man's Tokyo, but i'm here to tell you it has some serious game. it reminded me a lot of Brussels (or is it Bruges). a rich history, being the former capital of Japan, with hundreds of shrines popping up all over the landscape. mix in an amazing amount of small restaurants, bars, and shops tucked away on small cobbleston'esque roads, and you have an amazing little town. the big thing in the area of the city called Gion is the tendency to see the elusive Geisha running from client to client. misunderstood, there is still something that seems very taboo about the profession, although i am lead to believe it's fairly PG-13 these days. still, i was intrigued when out of the corner of a dark alley, we say the billowing white umbrella pop-up, and a woman in traditional garb making a jailbreak. the only piece of Japanese lore that didn't stumble across our paths would be the mighty sumo. the big boys, when not in a tourney, train at stables, mostly in Tokyo. something for next time. final bit to add, we met a local bar keep named Kenji-son in an Italian Bistro, an odd choice, but a good one. as we sipped on sake, exchanging broken English stories of life and adventure, he was kind enough to give us a few freebies courtesy of the house. finishing like we started, another local putting the 'free' in freedom.

so that's that. another Asian country done & dusted.
now we're really getting into the dregs….

as always, enjoy my non-Facebook album HERE

moneyballz

rest in peace, Steve.
i'll keep this brief, as the tribute is a bit unintentional, but certainly necessary.
i can't begin to compare my experience with the man & brand that a life long Jobs/Mac groupie can. that said, from the days in Amsterdam with my 2nd-gen iPod to the MacBook Pro being used to scribe this in HK, my journey around the World continues to be enhanced in the company of i.
many people have shared their thoughts on the passing; his life, his legacy.
a friend had this sobering take -

Steve jobs actually had all the money in the world. Shows how valuable health is.” #rememberwhatsimportant

the rest of this post may seem trivial in light of this. yet so many of you have been waiting for days to hear about my softball debut. and there is your subtle segue.

one word can describe my take on the first game of the season - intense. these guys are definitely not your typical weekend warriors. grown men, in full baseball gear, staring me down, trying to get a feel whether this rook has what it takes. a little on edge, i got the feeling that i was still on tryout as i stepped up to the plate in the 1st.
batting second, i quickly proceeded to fly out to centre.
get those nerves out early, kid.
next appearance, considerably better, as i stroked a double into the gap. all in, 1 for 3 on the day, with a walk. our team fared just about as well, getting thrashed 15-3 when it was all said and done. no matter, we'll get 'em next time.
hands-in, boys.
'1-2-3, Doghouse!'
and of course, it wouldn't be baseball without a beer & a dog at the ballpark. play hard, eat hard.
a league website, including player stats, just so happens to exist. once i get into my groove, i may share with my fanclub.

in closing, Japan is on the horizon - and that's your guarantee that the next post will be more inspirational than me sporting cleats and throwing down a wiener. i will say this though - from what i've been told, Tokyo is a city like no other, and i'm excited to share my experience of this metropolis with you all. with that in mind, i decided to partake in a quick social experiment. a message was sent, to a select group of people, to inquire whether they had been to Tokyo. simple question - "have you been to Tokyo?" and if so, "could you share with me as a list of 'musts'". easy, i reckoned. however, like my batting average, my 'friends' whiffed on me - 3 for 15. 3 people, out of 15, actually responded.
shame....
12 of you just cost yourselves a postcard. it's called tough love.

Concussions, Crocs & Cebu dreams

it has been a week to remember…..or forget, depends on how you look at it.
where to begin….oh yes, let's start with the first 'C'.

Part 1: Concussion at the summer company mixer
for those that know me, this should come as no surprise, but i tend to enjoy staff parties. what better way to blow off a little 9-5 steam than with a few cocktails, shared with co-workers exchanging witty office banter. no harm in that.
this year, the festivities took place poolside at the Macau Hard Rock hotel. on route to the venue, via shuttle bus with my local Chinese team, i was perhaps calling my shot when i eloquently suggested it would be rude of us, while at the Hard Rock, to not 'rock hard'. i took their puzzled silence as acceptance of this challenge and we proceeded on. as per these occasions, the beverages flowed freely from the time we arrived, and i indulged in moderation. as the night carried on, the crowd dwindled and a dip in the pool seemed timely, given i would never expose myself to large crowds. perhaps the fact that, post-swim, i decided to remain bare chested should have been an early flag of the evening that was to come. skip to the lounge bar downstairs, a little hip hop on the cut, courtesy of local DJ 'Snoop'.
"another drink for the road", I said, "then i must excuse myself, as it is a Monday night."
the next part should have been simple - men's room. open door. exit back to party. instead, it went - men's room, open door into head, bleed profusely, blame DJ when others arrive. of course, a few minutes later, i did take personal responsibility for my actions…can't play Snoop like that. was i concussed? perhaps mildly. embarrassed? a little bit. bleeding? yes, although i was assured stitches wouldn't be necessary, by a total of 0 qualified doctors. so there i was…a bloody, haggard mess. with no shoes.

Part 2: Croc Rock
let's call that possible concussion back into question, given 48-hours later, I ended up buying my first pair of Crocs. the horror.....
how long until the fanny pack, minivan, and semi-detach in the burbs?
It's over….
now, to my credit, these are Croc flip-flops, not the 'other' famous shoe in the line. this makes it a little better, but the truth is, i walked into the store with no shame in my game, gazing at the rainbow palette of tool totes that hung in front of me.
i was compelled to leap into this situation for 2 reasons:
#1 - a trip to Cebu (Philippines) 2 days later
&
#2 - i lost my previous pair at the aforementioned summer party, after 'rocking hard' (hence the no shoes).
i have to say though…they are pretty damn comfortable.
@sweetlegs65 i hear ya, bro. keep on keepin' on.

bring on the beach.

Part 3: Cebu next Tuesday
Cebu is 1 of over 7,000 islands in the Philippines, all without a salad dressing to lay claim to. this sad fact aside, it's a very warm & pleasant place, in climate and in culture. typical of our recent trips, this was a quick 4-nighter jaunt, with the majority of the time spent parked on a beach chair, working on my million HKD tan. we made some time for a quick snorkel trip (no underwater camera = no pictures of fish), along with a dinner outside the cozy confines of the Shangri-La, where we dined on crispy pata and washed it down with a cold San Miguel Light. good times. the trip came to an end this afternoon, tastefully serenaded by a local Filipino band at the boarding gate, prior to flying back to the Kong.
pictures for those interested are here.

stay tuned, we go Japanese in 3-weeks.